I just had to blog tonight and tell you about my day. I am feeling so overwhelmed and confused right now. So many emotions are going through me. I don't know what to do with all of them. I don't even know where to begin. Sometimes I feel like why even say anything or express how I am feeling. Does it really make a difference? Does it really touch others lives like they say it does? It doesn't feel like it sometimes. I am realizing just how much I still need to learn to love myself and forgive myself and celebrate myself. Sarah Nitta, who is the Marketing and Relations Director here at the Utah resort and who was on season 11 of The Biggest Loser gave a talk tonight about her story. It brought me to tears. It was so touching. But one thing that it did for me was make me realize how much I still don't believe in myself. She made a statement tonight during her talk that made me really question where my journey is going to end up. The statement that she made was she had a message while she was on the show and she was chatting with the massage therapist and he questioned her faith in God. She told him that she was good in that area and the therapist said he had to differ with her. She again said that she was good with that area and again the therapist said he had to differ with her. He said how can you have faith and believe in a Creator when you don't have faith or belief in yourself. Wow!!!!! talk about hitting home. I want so bad to believe in myself and have faith in myself to be able to change my life and to help others to change their lives. Anyways, that is just something that has been on my mind and I needed to get it off my chest.
My days started out with the most beautiful hike. Where we went today was call Petrified dunes. Talk about breath taking. There was a lot of rock climbing. It was pretty scary at some points. Just not thinking that I could climb to the top of that hill. But I DID IT!!!! I put my fear aside and did it. It felt so good to be able to concur that fear. We all had a great time this morning. Then this after noon I decided I was going to do 2 treading classes in a row. I didn't like one of the classes that was being offered so I did treading instead. Treading is a class that the resort offers. You go 5 minutes as hard or as fast as you can, then you recover for 5 minutes. Then you go 4 minutes as hard or fast as you can, with a 4 minute recovery, then 3, 2, 1. Well in the first treading class I ran at a 6.0 for the whole class time. My knee was killing but I pushed through it and decided to do a second treading class after the first. In that second treading class I decided to do the recumbent bike because my knee was really bothering me. I decided that I was going to do speed, then resistance, speed, then resistance, and so on. So during the resistance part of the class I did the level at 17 for 1.5-2.0 minutes. Thats the highest resistance that I have gone along with the fastest I have ever done that with. When we were done with the intervals part of the class we did a 30 second bonus. I did a resistance of 18 for 30 seconds. When I was done I felt so good. So there was my day. Even though all the emotions are going through my head and body, I had a FANTASTIC day. I need to start celebrating the little things in my life.
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